My Marathon

• One year ago today, I had the opportunity open up very suddenly to place my parents in the memory care secured unit at a nursing home about three minutes from my home. I will eventually go into more details on how that all transpired. But today, and actually for the whole last week or so, I have been remembering, feeling those anxious emotions, and grieving the loss of the normal I knew with Mom and Dad for the last three years. My husband and I took my parents out to lunch before we took them to the nursing home. They didn't know what was coming, and, while I know that's how it had to be, I continue to feel guilt that they really didn't know they had just left their house of 40 plus years for the last time. We lingered over this lunch. I didn't want it to end. I was scared, sad, and incredibly grateful that they would now be safe, all in the same breath. My eyes are tearful in this photo and my heart felt shattered. They trusted me to take care of them. Yet somehow, it felt like I was about to abandon them. One of the most difficult days of my life.